Sex, Religion, Politics, and Writing: Uncensored Interviews with the Authors and Artists of MLR Press

Laura Baumbach, interviewed by Sarah Black

Laura Baumbach is the author of fan fiction, screenplays, and numerous short stories, novellas, and novels. She is the owner of both MLR Press, LLC, and Manloveromance Promotions. She works as an emergency trauma nurse by night and an author by day, with her husband and two sons filling in her free hours.

Q: What do you remember about your first love?

A: I was nine. His name was Timmy and he lived next door. I'd like to think I attracted him with my sparkling and dynamic personality, but it was probably the B-cups I woke up with one morning. Tshirts to Playtex in one day. Training bras need not apply. It's always been a part of my…charm since them.

Q: Yeah, it's amazing, suddenly no one recognizes your face anymore! Whose David is sexier, Michelangelo's or Donatello's?

A: Why do I have to pick just one? Can't I have them both? If I have to be denied one of them, I like manly men, so I'll go with Michelangelo.

Q: What books are on your bedside table right now? Any new authors or books you'd like to recommend?

A: Books go on a bedside table? Who said so? I don't read in bed. I sleep or I make love and I don't need books for either. I have a phone, a clock, a pad and pen to write ideas down in the middle of the night and a tube of that lubricant that gets all warm when you…never mind.

Q: Is music important to your creative process? Tell me about that.

A: Yes and no. I can't write with it on, it distracts me and I make up stories to go with the music instead of working on what I'm supposed to be writing. But it does inspire me. The BeeGee's "I Surrender" inspired my vampire short short Walk Through Fire; an NSYC song birthed the vampire short Enthralled. I see romantic scenes that match the emotion of the song and it creates a whole story for me. Twisted ones, but great ones!

Q: Would you rather spend the weekend at the beach with Captain James T. Kirk of the Starship Enterprise, or Captain Jean-Luc Picard?

A: If I get to pick a Captain of a ship I want Jack Sparrow. A man who could satisfy me and make me laugh in bed. I think old Jack could be downright creative.

Q: So I guess I don't need to ask about favorite pirate? Best movie this year?

A: See above. Really. I've only seen Jack and "Meet the Robinsons." Lusty pirates win over animation any day.

Q: What do you think Jerry Falwell's first conversation with God was about?

A: I don't think he's talked to God yet. Brimstone is his color right now.

Q: Choose one of these men for an elegant dinner date, and tell me why 1) Gov. Bill Richardson, 2) Sen. John McCain, or 3) President Bill Clinton? What would you eat?

A: I get to eat one of these guys for dinner? Geez, I'll have to go look up their pictures first. I'll get back to you.

Q: Which of your own books or artworks is your favorite? Was it the easiest or the hardest?

A: A toss up between A Bit of Rough and Details of the Hunt. I love Bram and James because they were my first, but writing Talos and Aidan is a whole lot of fun. Aidan is such an unrepentant, larcenous soul, I just love to write him. They are both easy to write. The characters take over every time and the stories just flow out.

Q: Would you be more likely to read the winner of the National Book Award, The Edgar for Best Novel, or the Hugo for Best Novel? You have favorite Mystery or Sci-Fi authors?

A: I'd probably read the Edgar because I love mysteries but can't write one for love nor money. It always turns into a romance. Even my sci-fi turns into romance. All M/M romance, too. Favorite non-fiction, although that statement is debatable, the new health care package my husband's employer offers. Engrossing reading.

Q: Yeah, engrossing and terrifying.

A: I love Josh's Adrien English Mystery series the best right now.

Q: Oh, me, too. I'm a big fan. Any suggestions you'd like to pass on to the Pope?

A: There are millions of unwanted, uncared for children in this world. Stop encouraging their numbers!

Q: Amen, sister. Care to make a small wager concerning our next President?

A: I have a mental block on this issue. I don't do current events. I'm at the age where I have to worry about strokes.

Q: And we already have a high blood pressure problem in this country! The election may have us all on BP meds. Since I read The Golden Compass by Phillip Pullman, I've been fascinated by the idea of souls taking animal forms. If your soul took an animal form, what would it be?

A: I want to be a tigress, but damn, I'm an otter. Otter: Jan 20- Feb 18 A little quirky, and unorthodox, the Otter is a hard one to figure sometimes. Perceived as unconventional, the Otter methods aren't the first ones chosen to get the job done. This is a big mistake on the part of others- because though unconventional, the Otters methods are usually quite effective. Yes, the Otter has unusual ways of looking at things, but he/she is equipped with a brilliant imagination and intelligence, allowing him or her an edge over everyone else. Often very perceptive and intuitive, the Otter makes a very good friend, and can be very attentive. In a nurturing environment the Otter is sensitive, sympathetic, courageous, and honest. Left to his/her own devices, the Otter can be unscrupulous, lewd, rebellious, and isolated.